So, feel free to snoop this letter....
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Dear 20 year younger Shauna,
--School Crap:
You're a Senior in High School right now, and you have mixed feelings. You're ready to be done and out of that small town, because you know you were created for somewhere else... but you're also completely terrified and paralyzed in making any move. And that's fine. God is sovereign- and instead of being scared of that, you're going to come to be so thankful for that in the years to come.
You're a Senior in High School right now, and you have mixed feelings. You're ready to be done and out of that small town, because you know you were created for somewhere else... but you're also completely terrified and paralyzed in making any move. And that's fine. God is sovereign- and instead of being scared of that, you're going to come to be so thankful for that in the years to come.
-- FINISH WELL. Do the homework. YOU CAME SO FAR. You almost became a 5-year student but made the Honor Roll your Junior year. Don't let the joy of daydreaming keep you from being the best version of you you [can] be.
-- Don't cling to your teachers. Be grateful, but don't look to them as your life support. They were only meant to be in your life that way for your years there. Again, sovereignty. BE THANKFUL.
-- The mean girls- and guys? Glad you asked. Keep being who you are now: a confident daughter of the Father. Just take a moment to realize this comes from Him: not something you've just become and do on your own. Anyways, this takes you to the point you get nominated to be on a panel with a bunch of adults to calm all the incoming Freshmen. It's an honor. And, you hear from more than one teacher about how much more respect and joy they have for you then any one of those girls & guys. Believe me, they see you- and them. Continue to rise above it- you'll never regret it.
-- You're gonna stay home a year before you leave for college, but don't get anxious. It's time to learn to save money and embrace being home. ps, I can't wait for you to get the job you get. You won't even realize at the time how uniquely God has gifted you, and how He'll use that time in your life!
-- MUSIC MINISTRY:
There's going to come a time where this movement called, "worship" replaces "special music" in the Church. G I R L F R I E N D: You can't even imagine it. Actually, you can!! Because those moments you dream of and envision while singing into your hairbrush every night to the Shout to the Lord album from Hillsong that just came out: YOU LIVE THEM. Like, all the add-libs, solos, harmonies: ALL OF IT. So sing your Jaci Velasquez and Avalon proudly... because soon you'll have the last day you ever did. (Until this phenomenal artist, Natalie Grant comes.. in that case, you'll sing her stuff for special occasions.)
There's going to come a time where this movement called, "worship" replaces "special music" in the Church. G I R L F R I E N D: You can't even imagine it. Actually, you can!! Because those moments you dream of and envision while singing into your hairbrush every night to the Shout to the Lord album from Hillsong that just came out: YOU LIVE THEM. Like, all the add-libs, solos, harmonies: ALL OF IT. So sing your Jaci Velasquez and Avalon proudly... because soon you'll have the last day you ever did. (Until this phenomenal artist, Natalie Grant comes.. in that case, you'll sing her stuff for special occasions.)
-- The subject of BOYS:
Here's. The. Thing. I won't pack punches: you appreciate truth & honesty upfront. You're single even into your 30's. In fact, you're gonna meet some guys and date them, one or two of them may even break your heart & and you'll weep & pray on the floor. G I R L F R I E N D: FEEL THOSE FEELINGS. And then after a few months, dust yourself off and keep moving forward. YOU WILL NEVER REGRET NOT MARRYING THEM. I know, I know... #butreally. (That looks weird now, but you'll get it once you see it.)
Here's. The. Thing. I won't pack punches: you appreciate truth & honesty upfront. You're single even into your 30's. In fact, you're gonna meet some guys and date them, one or two of them may even break your heart & and you'll weep & pray on the floor. G I R L F R I E N D: FEEL THOSE FEELINGS. And then after a few months, dust yourself off and keep moving forward. YOU WILL NEVER REGRET NOT MARRYING THEM. I know, I know... #butreally. (That looks weird now, but you'll get it once you see it.)
You're also... I debate on telling you this. But.... you're also gonna meet some guys who love Jesus but don't love their wives like Christ loves the Church. And it's gonna scare you. You'll have a hard time trusting men (which really, now that I think about it- it won't come as a surprise)... but believe me when I say, "THEY DO EXIST!" And you'll meet plenty of women who will take you under your wing as they let you watch their families. Shauna, they really do exist.
There's gonna come a season where you hear the phrases, "You intimidate me. You would've intimidated me- I could've never dated you...You're so tall, strong, smart, really spiritual." Listen girl: THE APOSTLE PAUL NEVER MEANT FOR YOU TO not ever laugh around guys, raise your hand and offer insight, or to freaking wear flats for a decade for fear of a man not like or appreciating your long legs and height. NOT ONE GUY IS WORTH you not wanting to wear or look what you want to wear & look like!! DO YOU HEAR ME SCREAMING AT YOU?!
-- GOD STUFF:
You will love the Father, Son & Spirit more than you could ever comprehend. Start practicing the discipline of getting on your knees and laying prostrate before the Lord in your bedroom or apartment. That's something I never did and is my most important piece of advice for you. Beg God to reveal more of Himself to you. I didn't, because I feared He only tolerated me. LISTEN TO ME LINDA: LINDA LISTEN: HE DOES MORE THAN TOLERATE YOU-- HE LOVES YOU. ("Linda" will make more sense too... sorry, but I just can't help myself!)
Again, not to scare you, but: you'll have some "dark nights of the soul". Don't be scared. Do what you did: Leave the Bible by your pillow. Put "It is Well" from Shane & Shane on repeat. (Oh gosh, you don't even know Shane & Shane yet. Just, believe me: their harmonies will make you swoon.) You don't, however, have to beg God: He is already near. But, again, referring to the above: Get on your knees. You'll never regret it.
Without giving too much away, the second-best piece of advice I could give you? Always give your thoughts, impressions and knowledge about God back to God and say, "Is this Who You are? Do You work in other ways? I don't want to put You in a box...."
Fear is your constant companion. I've managed to keep "him" at bay most of the time now. God never prepares you by instilling fear in you. NEVER. Never Shauna, NEVER. So if and when you feel fear: it's from the pit of Hell and you tell Lucie (aka, Satan, Lucifer, the stupid one, etc) to go directly back to hell because that's where Jesus will put him anyways.
Random Stuff:
-- That conversation with your dad that you play over and over in your head all the time? HAVE THAT CONVERSATION. God's grace will be more than enough. Just... just believe me.
--As soon as you get used to the internet (out of college, of course. Insert palm face here... don't worry, that'll make more sense in 20 years too)... look up these two words: introvert and the Enneagram. Just... just take my word for it. God designed you- and His sovereignty is all over you... but... there are some moments where if you learned at least what it is to be an Introvert: that'll help your friendships and relationships... DEEPLY. You know what: I'll even just tell you right now. Stop thinking you're going to miss out on something and stay in more nights a week. That annoyance you feel when you're around most people? It's because you need time alone.
--That short, blonde, peppy and way too joyful girl you meet your first year away at college? PUT YOUR FIRST IMPRESSION to the back burner and get to know her. Trust me. She's in your life for life. To the point you'll spend so many Christmas' with her & her family that her kids demand you be there. Even when they're teenagers.
--You're going to become allergic to dairy. GUUUURL: Eat. It. Up. While. You. Can!!!!!!
--Don't be scared of Chiropractors. They're amazing. And you'll cry every time you have to move away from one.
--YOU ARE GOING TO TRAVEL THE WORLD AND IT WILL BE AMAZING. Okay, well, not all the world, but you will travel 9,000+ miles in 3 months with a bunch of strangers. You can feel the excitement, can't you? Do you want to know now or later that you'll live 10 minutes walking from the Pacific? and at another point, just six hours from Florida? I know you can't imagine it... but remember... mostly importantly:
You will love the Father, Son & Spirit more than you could ever comprehend. Start practicing the discipline of getting on your knees and laying prostrate before the Lord in your bedroom or apartment. That's something I never did and is my most important piece of advice for you. Beg God to reveal more of Himself to you. I didn't, because I feared He only tolerated me. LISTEN TO ME LINDA: LINDA LISTEN: HE DOES MORE THAN TOLERATE YOU-- HE LOVES YOU. ("Linda" will make more sense too... sorry, but I just can't help myself!)
Again, not to scare you, but: you'll have some "dark nights of the soul". Don't be scared. Do what you did: Leave the Bible by your pillow. Put "It is Well" from Shane & Shane on repeat. (Oh gosh, you don't even know Shane & Shane yet. Just, believe me: their harmonies will make you swoon.) You don't, however, have to beg God: He is already near. But, again, referring to the above: Get on your knees. You'll never regret it.
Without giving too much away, the second-best piece of advice I could give you? Always give your thoughts, impressions and knowledge about God back to God and say, "Is this Who You are? Do You work in other ways? I don't want to put You in a box...."
Fear is your constant companion. I've managed to keep "him" at bay most of the time now. God never prepares you by instilling fear in you. NEVER. Never Shauna, NEVER. So if and when you feel fear: it's from the pit of Hell and you tell Lucie (aka, Satan, Lucifer, the stupid one, etc) to go directly back to hell because that's where Jesus will put him anyways.
Random Stuff:
-- That conversation with your dad that you play over and over in your head all the time? HAVE THAT CONVERSATION. God's grace will be more than enough. Just... just believe me.
--As soon as you get used to the internet (out of college, of course. Insert palm face here... don't worry, that'll make more sense in 20 years too)... look up these two words: introvert and the Enneagram. Just... just take my word for it. God designed you- and His sovereignty is all over you... but... there are some moments where if you learned at least what it is to be an Introvert: that'll help your friendships and relationships... DEEPLY. You know what: I'll even just tell you right now. Stop thinking you're going to miss out on something and stay in more nights a week. That annoyance you feel when you're around most people? It's because you need time alone.
--That short, blonde, peppy and way too joyful girl you meet your first year away at college? PUT YOUR FIRST IMPRESSION to the back burner and get to know her. Trust me. She's in your life for life. To the point you'll spend so many Christmas' with her & her family that her kids demand you be there. Even when they're teenagers.
--You're going to become allergic to dairy. GUUUURL: Eat. It. Up. While. You. Can!!!!!!
--Don't be scared of Chiropractors. They're amazing. And you'll cry every time you have to move away from one.
--YOU ARE GOING TO TRAVEL THE WORLD AND IT WILL BE AMAZING. Okay, well, not all the world, but you will travel 9,000+ miles in 3 months with a bunch of strangers. You can feel the excitement, can't you? Do you want to know now or later that you'll live 10 minutes walking from the Pacific? and at another point, just six hours from Florida? I know you can't imagine it... but remember... mostly importantly:
COURAGEOUS IS THE TRUE YOU.
You see her from time to time now. She's the one standing up for abortion in front of her whole class and getting mocked. She's the one who gets asked to be on panels. She's the one who won the talent Contest at CHS the year before. She's the you that will win 2nd Place at an event at a JMG State meet. She's the you that makes up a couple of the coolest parts of the Senior Dance off. She's the you who walks with her head up despite wanting to have committed suicide back in Middle School because of the bullies. She's the you who knows that God is real and you're willing to pursue obeying Him despite what those closest to you believe.
COURAGEOUS IS THE TRUE YOU.
So, 20 year younger Shauna,
You got this. Like, REALLY you got this.
'Cause He's got you in the palm of His hand.
<3
Future You.
